Mean what you say and show it in your actions

According to Harvard Business Review, 57% of employees report not being given clear directions, and 69% of managers are uncomfortable communicating with employees. No wonder I hear, “We need better communication!” at just about every workplace.

Effective communication is:

• Timely and well planned.

• Clear and unambiguous.

• Short and to the point.

• Consistent over time (and when things change, there is a clear explanation).

• Regular and ongoing (even when you don’t have much new to say).

Further considerations include:

• Actions and body language align with words — avoid mixed messages!

• Values and purpose are clear and understood.

• Know your audience.

• Focus on who needs to know what information.

• The “why” of decisions is clearly explained.

This is a lot to consider, but when one or more of these elements are missing, communication can be ineffective. People may become cynical and circulate rumors, diminishing morale and workplace productivity. “They don’t really mean what they say,” is an all-toocommon workplace complaint. According to a Salesforce study, organizations that communicate ineffectively are more likely to have high employee turnover.

In a 2019 article in this publication (“Providing employees with a sense of calm,” Nov. 8-21, 2019, NH Business Review), Carol Phillips advocates for proactively welcoming new employees, greeting employees every day, addressing negativity when it arises and regularly saying thank you. The Ken Blanchard Companies promote conversational capacity — the ability of an individual or team to engage in open, balanced, nondefensive dialogue about difficult subjects and in challenging circumstances.

Achieving this requires personal and situational awareness, cultivating a mindset that places learning and smart choices ahead of emotional reaction and developing skills in candor and curiosity.

Another consideration is how to best deliver your message. Options include one-on-one, face-to-face; written via email, text message or handwritten note; or verbally expressed in a group setting. It is important to consider what is the best way to deliver different kinds of information. Thoughtful planning is essential!

Another important aspect of communication is effective listening, what Steven Covey describes as listening to understand as opposed to listening to respond.

In “What You Don’t Know About Listening Could Fill a Book,” Jon White and Alexandra Taketa argue that poor listening is a common root cause of leadership problems. They contend that asking open-ended “what” questions, offered in the spirit of curiosity, is the most important listening skill. These kinds of questions invite the other person to tell you more, facilitating meaningful conversations and building positive relationships.

A further communication skill is giving and receiving feedback which is essential to address workplace issues and help people grow — including yourself! People are quick to criticize others these days, but very little of it lives up to the standard espoused by Abraham Lincoln: “He has the right to criticize who has the heart to help.” This is the spirt in which great feedback is offered!

When offering criticism, focus on the behavior, not the person, and be clear about your expectations. Choose the best time and place. Avoid reacting or engaging when people are emotional, and do not give negative feedback to someone in the presence of other people.

The best feedback is offered in a positive, constructive way in one-on-one settings. It is important to be calm, open, supportive, and use positive body language.

I love this powerful quote from Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl: “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

It is also important to be open to receiving feedback, including inviting those who work with you to provide it. They may be reluctant at first to criticize the boss or a co-worker, and it can sometimes be tough to hear. But when you demonstrate that you really want feedback, you earn respect and get invaluable information that helps you grow as a leader.

For further thought: How are you doing as a leader when it comes to communication? Do people have a clear sense of what you are trying to communicate? Are there inconsistencies that fuel distrust? Are you applying effective listening skills and using feedback appropriately? List three specific things you could do to strengthen your communication effectiveness and reflect on how you might get help to up your communication leadership game.

We each have an extraordinary opportunity to make a difference in people’s lives, including our own. Don’t underestimate your impact.

Douglas P. Teschner, founder of Growing Leadership LLC, can be reached at dteschner@GrowingLeadershipLLC.com.