Leaders who encourage respect serve both business and country

Two of your best employees had always worked well together to the benefit of your business, but more recently their political differences have led to diminished cooperation. You notice them having heated discussions about the upcoming election or, alternatively, avoiding each other altogether.

Unfortunately, these kinds of conflicts are pretty common nowadays. Respect for differences of opinion have declined since I was a member of the New Hampshire Legislature 18 years ago. Add the stresses of Covid-19, racial discord and a general decline in basic manners (remember Mr. Rogers telling children to be kind to one another?), and we have a pretty toxic dynamic.

The two most common alternatives — engaging in conflict or avoiding it altogether — are proving to be equally inadequate. A better approach is to talk civilly and listen respectfully to people with other points of view. As Ezra klein wrote in “Why We’re Polarized,” we need to have disagreements where the losers still feel respected.

Concerned about these issues, I volunteered to serve as Northern New England coordinator for Braver Angels, a national nonprofit citizens organization uniting Americans with different political views.

Braver Angels asks people to listen to understand others, look for common ground and ways to work together, and support principles that bring people together rather than divide us. Core values include respect, humility, honesty and responsible citizenship. Couldn’t we use more of this in the workplace?

Wait a minute, you say, I am trying to run a business, I don’t have time to deal with this stuff!

As I have written previously, people problems and work conflicts are among the most challenging aspects of being a leader, but successfully managing challenging situations is an important element of leadership effectiveness. Helping staff to develop new skills and better understand how their behavior impacts others is important for business success.

I would argue that political conflict is not just about politics, but also reflects a general decline in how people relate to each other. Road rage, social media rants, rudeness in public, etc., are byproducts of an erosion in both personal responsibility and sense of community. When we hire people who have been influenced by this declining cultural environment (meaning pretty much everybody), you can be sure it affects your business, too!

At a recent church service, I was struck by these words in the prayer of forgiveness:

“Too often we connect our sense of success with someone else’s failure.”

What’s a business leader to do? Here are a few suggestions:

• Reflect: Are you doing anything that adds to the problem?

• Model positive behavior: The character traits of leaders matter. When you set a positive example by exhibiting empathy and listening to differing points of view, your team is more likely to follow.

• Adopt a company code: Most organizations have mission statements of some kind. Review yours to ensure it incorporates values and expectations such as respect, honesty and empathy for both co-workers and customers.

• Communicate expectations: Most mission statements collect dust on the wall, so it is important to remind people what yours says and to act in ways that show you really mean it.

• Deal with interpersonal conflict: When necessary, intervene in situations like that described in the first paragraph. These are challenging conversations to manage, but when you have set clear expectations and model positive behavior, they are easier and ultimately more effective.

• Reach out: Engage in a personal and curious way with people on the other side of political or other issues. Increasingly, many of us are self-limited to a bubble of people who think like us, and this can be very self-limiting.

• Learn more: Read books and listen to podcasts that explore these issues. Seek out resources and join groups such as Braver Angels. (You can become a member for only $12 at braverangels.org.)

We each have an extraordinary opportunity to make a difference in people’s lives, including our own. Don’t underestimate your impact! you can strengthen your business and our country, too.

Douglass P. Teschner, founder of Growing Leadership LLC, can be reached at dteschner@Growing-LeadershipLLC.com.